Diary of An Unrepentant Sex Addict

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Pitching That Final Bitch

So, a little more about my "last spin" with the sex worker last night. As an aside, the phrase "pitching a final bitch" is not a reference to the woman herself; it's a phrase I picked up in a book I read ages ago, a scene in which a lead female character is breaking off an extramarital affair, but wants one more go-round before they never see each other again. She says to her soon-to-be-ex, "So my boyo, let us pitch a final bitch." It somehow seems to fit, here. I will write more in the future about my opinions on prostitution in general (it should be at least decriminalized, if not outright legalized), and my feelings about sex workers in particular (they deserve far more rights than they currently enjoy, and are usually infinitely more honest than your average Enron or Tycho exec). But for now, on to the meat of the matter, as it were...

I prefer a certain kind of encounter when I'm visiting a sex worker. In the obfuscated-slang parlance of "hobbyists", it's called the GFE, or girl-friend experience. This can mean a variety of things, but it's generally assumed to include at least a majority of the following:

  • Light kissing on the mouth (LK)
  • Deep, full kissing on the mouth (DFK, also sometimes interpreted at "deep French kissing")
  • Receiving oral sex without a cover (BBBJ, for "bare-back blowjob")
  • Permitting the man to go down on the woman (DATY, for "Dining At The Y")
  • Allowing multiple "pops" (orgasms) for the man within the time period, if he can.

Note that unprotected intercourse is not on that list. I'm sure that some readers will want to immediately comment on the risks of unprotected oral sex, but those are risks I choose to accept. (Please don't waste my time or yours commenting on it.)

So anyway, I like the GFE. I have to be careful, though, because I have a great aversion to smokers (more on that later, but the short version is that the "flavor" of kissing a smoker is rank). And since sex work is stressful, brought about by a variety of factors-- danger of getting busted, danger of an abusive customer, etc.-- that cannot be immediately dealt with, it's no real surprise that a lot of sex workers smoke. So I have to screen potential choices before plopping down my hard-earned cash.

This is all a long-winded build-up, of course. Last night was a repeat visit to someone I had already seen hefore. Someone who was a good logical choice for a (semi-)final visit. She's an older Chinese woman who goes by "Candy", who works through an agency that sets up girls in apartments. My first encounter with her was almost literally earth-moving. During that encounter, she got me to accomplish two things I very rarely do: first, I climaxed in missionary position while wearing a condom. I have a hard-enough time popping while wearing a cover, and mish isn't my favorite position. But by the time we'd gotten to that point, she had me so revved up it literally snuck up on me. The second thing was, that I climaxed a second time within a half-hour of the first. I'm not as young as I used to be (heh), and I've let my physical fitness go for several years now. But she latched her mouth onto my little friend like it was the Fount of Life Itself, and just didn't give up until I erupted a second time. The thing is, Candy isn't that attractive, physically. She's clearly in her mid- to late-forties, at least. Her hair is stringy, and her body is flabby in a few places. I could, for the same money, have seen a seriously-hot 20-23 year-old. But this girl was the shit, so much so that I went back for seconds last night.

Well, here's where being a confessed sex-addict comes in. Last night just wasn't as good. The newness wasn't there. The enthusiasm was, on her part at least. I had refrained from whacking off for a few days, in anticipation. (I had decided to do this as my "farewell" visit a week or so ago, but Candy only just returned from vacation.) The first pop was great. This girl has forgotten more about rimming and blowjobs than most women will ever know. I imagine she could even teach gay men a thing or two. Unlike the first time I visited her, the first eruption came from oral. Also unlike the first visit, I was unable to manage a second erection. Well, I did, right at the end of the hour. To her credit, she was willing to go over the clock, but the agency called her to tell her another client was en route. In the intervening time, we kissed, cuddled and caressed a lot. I also went down. Now, not to brag or anything, but I'm really fucking good at that. More on this later, too, but I was taught and trained by a bisexual woman who could direct me both on what she liked and what she herself had found to be most effective. I went to town on Candy for a good 15-20 minutes, after which she grabbed a condom and went for my cock with a vengence. Alas, nothing. And giving head usually gives me a raging hard-on, since I seriously get off on the responses of the woman. But not last night. If I could, I have no doubt she would have ridden me like a Harley. My loss. (And yes, I realize that all of her responses could have been faked, and at least some probably were. But that's part of the whole illusion, and I accept it.)

So I stumbled out, a little more than an hour after I arrived. I had the one orgasm, much more satisfying than taking things in hand, but not the two I assumed I would have when I went in. But the warm feelings of the enounter will carry me for a few days at least, before I start to feel the withdrawal symptoms again.




  • This has been such an entertaining read, that I'm sad that you're calling it an early night... ;-)

    By Anonymous Rachel, at Wednesday, April 06, 2005 11:40:00 PM  

  • i need to hear more. i've been having an affair with someone i think is a sex addict. 8 years of my life i thought i was the only one. can a sex addict truly love one woman? i've lost 8 years but still hold on to him thinking i can change him. am i a fool? help me understand so i can move on with regaining my life. please help me.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Saturday, October 15, 2005 11:31:00 PM  

  • "Can a sex addict truly love one woman?" Sure, its possible. Will he be monogomous? Very unlikely. Haven't we moved beyond equating sex with love?

    By Anonymous Fooble, at Thursday, April 05, 2007 4:18:00 PM  

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