Diary of An Unrepentant Sex Addict

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Sex Makes Men Stupid

That is the only explanation I can come up with for the story I am about to relate to you.

This story doesn't actually involve me, it was related to me by an ex-SO with whom I'm still close. It's a sordid tale of an adventurous couple who, as you would expect, find that their first threesome didn't end up as planned.

Actually, this tale isn't so much sordid as sad. I don't have the deliciously-dirty details of deeds done. My friend didn't give me much detail, but you can just plug-in your favorite two-girls-one-guy threeway story. Only lame it up some, as you'll understand shortly.

See, there's my ex, P, with whom I'm still close friends. Then there is the married couple, PN and AN (Mr. and Mrs., in that order). The problem is that P is a tenant of AN, and a former employee. Because of this, and because she is the sort to easily fall into a feeling of obligation towards others, she found herself recently in the company of a drunken AN and a lecherous PN. In their company when AN decided she wanted to have a threesome, give PN a chance to experience a fantasy. She wasn't exactly subtle, throwing herself at P and not really taking "no" for an answer.

At this point, you're no doubt thinking that P need to make it clear that "no means no". But she is currently in debt to them, financially and in other ways. She didn't feel like she could really say no. So she decided to go along with it, even against her better judgement.

But what she did do, wisely (in my opinion), was rein in the experience for PN. Keep in mind that P is the amazing oralist who taught me (almost) everything I know about going down on a woman. The source of some of the best blowjobs I've received. But also one of the savviest people I've ever shared a bed with. She made it a point to not be too terribly good in the bed. She also made sure that she herself didn't bring him to orgasm, that he only came with his wife. Afterwards, she made tracks for home.

Well, this is where my statement in the subject line comes in. What is it that makes men so stupid when it comes to sex? I don't mean the stupidity of the situation itself; that's easily explained: she's a drunk and he's a lech. That's not what I'm referring to as stupid. This is: he told his wife that the threesome evening was the best sex he'd had in ages. His birthday was a few days ago, and when AN asked him what he wanted, he said flat out that he wanted a threesome with P again.

So, relations between P and AN have been somewhat strained. She's worried that AN will retaliate through the tenant/employee nature of their relationship. It's not an unreasonable fear, as AN is not always a reasonable person.

This isn't a request for advice. I have none to offer P, and I know that there is little if anything my readership can offer.

What this is, is a request to the men out there: wise the fuck up. Don't go telling your wife/SO/etc. after a threesome that it was the best you've ever had. And if you do, for fuck's sake, make it clear that it was HER that made it special. This situation was just totally bone-headed, and two people are hurt as a result.

Someday I'll write about my first threesome (which, not coincidentally, included P). And when I do, I'll hopefully illustrate how I managed to keep both of my partners contented emotionally, as opposed to feeling alienated or exploited. I mean, sheesh, did this guy think this was the surest way to a second adventure?


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  • Heh, you are a wise man.

    I will not have a MFF threesome with my primary because he's too stupid to handle it. As it stands now, I'm not really interested in a threesome with anyone but friends with benefits, hopefully all of us on a level playing field.

    Playing the 3rd person, with a couple... I believe that 75% of the threesome ended badly between the couple. Oddly enough, more often then not, it was because the other bi-female gave up men :D


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Tuesday, October 25, 2005 10:30:00 PM  

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